


Separate Paths

by aislingdoheanta



Series: Intimate Conversations [10]
Category: Spartacus Series (TV), Spartacus: War of the Damned
Genre: Canon Era Fic, Episode 3.08, Episode: Separate Paths, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-23
Updated: 2013-04-23
Packaged: 2017-12-09 06:42:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/771206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aislingdoheanta/pseuds/aislingdoheanta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Nasir turned away from him, shaking his head. This could not be happening. They had been through much together as of late and this was not how it was supposed to end. Agron was not supposed to just leave him behind without a second thought. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Do not ask me to turn from you,” Nasir begged quietly, his vision blurring as he turned back to Agron.</i>
</p>
<p>The conversation that changed everything and the aftermath.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Separate Paths

**Author's Note:**

> Extended/Missing Scene from Episode 8. Starts with their conversation and takes place through the night.

Nasir smiled at those he passed in his search for Agron. His warrior had been quiet and reserved as of late and Nasir worried where his thoughts had led him. 

Agron, as Nasir knew, had vulnerabilities that he had only just begun voicing. He feared his worth would not measure up, in battle, with Spartacus, to Nasir. To Agron his worth was only encompassed in his superior skills in fighting and battle. 

Nasir wished to rid him of such thoughts. Especially if their time together might be drawing to a close if Crassus' legions were close at heel. 

Nasir saw Agron leaning against a pillar and made way toward him. He looked deep in thought, but Nasir couldn't help but smile at him. His love for the man knew no bounds and he did not wish to see him brood throughout the evening. 

He stopped in front of him and passed him a cup. Agron briefly glanced at him and quirked his lips before looking down at the cup in his hands as Nasir took a drink. 

Nasir's brow crinkled as he asked, “You do not share in drink?” 

“I would have clear head when sun breaks and Crixus strikes for Rome,” Agron said, though he did not look up from his study of the ground and cup. 

Nasir glanced behind him to see Crixus and Naevia chatting happily with the group they were surrounded by. “I have often been at cross purpose with the Gaul.” Nasir turned back to Agron and noticed that his eyes were on Crixus. “Yet his fucking presence shall be missed,” Nasir finished. 

Agron's eyes skimmed over Nasir as he gave a grimace and settled once more on the ground. “I shall not feel the sting of it,” Agron said as he looked up, gazing blankly ahead. He swallowed a few times and pressed his lips together. 

Nasir wanted to laugh but did not. “You yet hate the man?” 

“I will not miss his presence,” Agron started before pausing to take a breath. He swallowed as he turned to fully look at Nasir for the first time. His eyes were dark, watery, and had a haunted look in them as they stared at Nasir's chest. He took one final breath before moving them up to connect with Nasir's eyes as he said, “Because I shall not be from it.” 

Nasir looked down in confusion for this was not something he had prepared for. It had never crossed Nasir's mind that Agron might have preferred to leave with Crixus instead of staying with Spartacus. After a pause, Nasir looked back up at Agron as he asked, “You turn from Spartacus to march with Crixus?”

Agron's eyes did not leave his as he said, “Spartacus stands as a brother. Yet in this, we are not of like mind.” Agron took a pause before he shook his head, saying, “There is no life for me beyond the Alps. I am no shepherd nor tiller of land.”

Nasir had to smile and tilt his head because it was difficult to picture Agron working in a field that was not preparing for battle. He would end up attacking the plants he was intending to harvest for not growing the way he had expected them too. 

Agron continued with slight desperation to his voice, “Blood and battle are all I have ever known.”

Nasir smiled. “It is settled then. Tomorrow we move for Rome with Crixus.” He smiled again and saw a flash of Agron's smile before the man bowed his head. 

“To hear such words,” Agron said as he lifted his head back up. “Lift spirit.” 

Nasir smiled at him. He was relieved that he was able to quiet his man's worry over nothing. Of course Nasir would follow Agron into battle because that's where they belonged: together, fighting for freedom as they had been taught. 

Agron visibly steeled himself before he whispered, “Yet I would have you take with Spartacus.”

Nasir felt his heart cease for a moment as Agron's words found way to his mind. “My place is forever with you.”

Agron smiled at him, but it was bitter. “Not in this,” he whispered, his voice filled with pain. 

Nasir looked down, feeling his eyes well with tears as he took to heart what Agron was telling him. He was _leaving_ and did not wish Nasir to be by his side. He no longer wanted him. No longer needed him and Nasir was expected to just accept that as if they never mattered. As if _he_ never mattered.

Anger battled with pain and hurt in his chest as he looked back up at Agron. “You once swore the gods themselves could not wrest me from your arms.” He swallowed before he continued. “And now you fucking cast me aside!”

“My heart will never beat for another,” Agron said quickly. He took a deep breath as if the next thought physically pained him. “Yet it wold seize within chest if I were to drag you to your doom.”

“I am a warrior!” Nasir insisted. 

Agron smiled but it was merely a shadow of the smile Nasir had grown fond of. “One I am _most_ proud of,” he said softly and firmly as if that was the simplest truth to ever exist. “Set skills to aiding Spartacus and see those less able to true freedom.”

Nasir turned away from him, shaking his head. This could not be happening. They had been through much together and this was not how it was supposed to end. Agron was not supposed to just leave him behind without a second thought. 

“Do not ask me to turn from you,” Nasir begged quietly, his vision blurring as he turned back to Agron. 

“I ask only that you _live_ ,” Agron said softly. “And wrest what joy that yet may be found in remaining days.”

Nasir felt his throat constrict as if someone was choking him. He wasn't sure who reached out first, but then Agron's lips gently, quickly, pressed against his before he found himself against Agron's chest. He pressed his face into Agron's neck and let out a small whimper of breath as he held on. 

Agron was truly leaving. And Nasir was being forced to remain behind as Agron potentially marched to his death. 

Though the last words Agron spoke to him made Nasir realize why he was doing this: It was _for_ Nasir. Agron believed he was going to his death and he wished for Nasir to have the life they had only recently begun talking about. To Agron, it was a declaration of love and devotion that Nasir would not fall in this war but have a fighting chance for the freedom he was convinced Nasir deserved more. 

While it killed him, Nasir _understood._ It was flawed reasoning because he hadn't thought about what Nasir wanted, but it was sound reasoning to Agron and the way his mind worked. 

While Nasir wanted to fight and insist on him joining Agron, he would not. He had _seen_ how much it had hurt Agron to accept this and admit it. After everything they had been through, staying behind was something he could do for Agron, for Spartacus, for himself, in order to allow Agron's focus to remain on the upcoming battle. 

Even if he hated it. 

“I must break words with Spartacus,” Agron said softly though he seemed hesitant to let go of Nasir. 

Nasir only nodded against him. He wanted to clutch at the man, to attach himself to Agron's side so they could not be parted, but that was foolish. 

Agron kissed the side of his head before pulling away. He smiled sadly at him. 

Nasir attempted a weak, half-smile in return. Then he watched as the man made his way through the crowd in search of Spartacus. 

Nasir drank the rest of his wine and felt like the world was spinning. He felt his chest constrict and his heart beat harder in his chest. He felt like he couldn't breathe, like the world itself was constricting on him. 

He felt a hand on his arm but pulled it free. He just needed to get away, to _be_ away from the people. 

“Nasir,” Naevia's voice whispered in his ear. “Come this way,” she said as she gently pulled him away from all the others. 

He did not speak as she carefully led him to the room he had set aside for himself and Agron. She squeezed his hand and smiled sadly at him as she left him in the hall. 

Nasir walked in and just looked around. He hadn't had time to set anything up or unpack anything. Now he would have no need to because Agron was leaving. 

Agron was leaving Nasir behind. 

Nasir thought about staying the night elsewhere, but could not bring himself to leave. Even if it would be more painful, he was going to spend one last night in Agron's arm, if the man was agreeable to it. 

Nasir walked over to where their things were gently laid and went about sorting their belongings in an effort to help Agron prepare for his journey. He could not remain idle when his mind was not quiet. 

He worked without really acknowledging what he was doing. He carefully bundled together the few things he was certain Agron would need. He reached a hand up to his hair as he looked at the remaining clothing. He felt the leather strip that held his hair back and was struck with an idea. He wanted to give Agron something to remember him by and perhaps fight that much harder to return to him. 

Nasir pulled the tie from his hair and carefully tied it to a piece of Agron's armor. He hoped that it might bring Agron some comfort when he discovered it. He set the armor with the other garments and started putting everything into a pack for Agron to carry with him. 

He was debating which cloak to pack—unless he just pack all of them because the weather could change in a moment—when Agron cleared his throat from the doorway. 

Nasir dropped the cloaks and looked down. “I thought I might help you pack for your journey,” he said softly. 

“Gratitude,” Agron said with a sad smile. He crossed the room to pick up the cloaks. He placed the blue one and the brown one on top of the pack and then turned to face Nasir. He held out the thick, winter cloak. “To keep you warm on cold nights,” he said quietly. _Since I will no longer be there_ went unsaid. 

Nasir grabbed it and held it tight within his hands. “It will be most welcome.” 

Agron coughed. “I shall find sleep elsewhere,” he said quietly. 

Nasir grabbed his arm to stop him. “I would have you remain.” 

Agron smiled at him hesitantly. “Then I shall.” 

Nasir dropped the cloak and walked to Agron. He ran his hands up Agron's chest to undo the armor he wore. 

Agron's brow furrowed in confusion, but he obliged Nasir. He helped him remove the armor before reaching out and placing his hands upon Nasir's face. One hand slid to the back of his head and held Nasir's hair gently between fingers as he sighed. 

Nasir reached up to grip Agron's wrists, his gaze never wavering from Agron's. There were words on his tongue, words he was desperate to say, yet he could not. He could only move his hands along Agron's arms to fall to his waist. Nasir removed Agron's subligaria with shaking hands and let his fingers roam over the skin exposed. 

Agron's hands moved from Nasir's hair to his waist to remove the clothing Nasir still wore. He pulled Nasir into his arms. He kissed Nasir's hair and forehead before Nasir tilted his face up to allow Agron to claim his lips. 

Nasir wanted to feel Agron, all of him, if this was their last night together. He walked back towards the bed, pulling Agron along with him, though the gladiator had not released Nasir's mouth. 

Nasir pushed Agron onto the bed before falling in next to him. He pulled himself on top of Agron with a knee on either side of him. He kissed along Agron's jaw before attacking his mouth once more. He wanted to prove to himself, to Agron that beside him was where he belonged. _Not in this._

Nasir broke away to trail kisses along Agron's neck and chest. _Yet I would have you take with Spartacus._ He felt his eyes begin to burn but pushed it back. 

Agron had one arm wrapped around him that pulled Nasir impossibly closer as the other tangled in Nasir's hair. He sighed and choked in a breath. 

_My heart will never beat for another._ Nasir felt a few tears leak out as he thought about how this was the last time he would likely ever be with Agron. He was leaving for battle where the chances of escaping with life were not in his favor. _Yet it would seize within chest if I were to drag you to your doom._

And if he did survive, it would be difficult for him to find Nasir again with all the Romans looking for rebels. 

“Nasir?” Agron asked quietly. 

Nasir realized that he had stopped and was merely resting his head against Agron's chest as tears fell from his eyes. He did not wish Agron to see him in such a state because it was foolish. He was foolish for being upset over this for there was nothing to be done. 

Agron's hand tightened in his hair but Nasir did not look up. He just pressed his face into Agron's chest and tried to calm his breathing. _I ask only that you live._

“Nasir,” Agron whispered as he pulled him up. Nasir only buried his face in Agron's neck, still too upset over Agron's impending departure and his reaction to it to do anything more. 

Agron's arms tightened around him and he pressed his head against Nasir's. He shifted so Nasir was laying on his side and pressed into Agron so he could reach down to grab some blankets to cover them. Nasir's leg was thrown over Agron and tangled between Agron's legs. 

Agron just held him close again but when he pressed his face into Nasir's hair, Nasir felt the wetness of tears. 

There were many things that Nasir wanted to say to Agron. _Don't leave._

_I would go with you._

_How am I to live without you?_

_I love you._

Yet he would not. He had understood hours ago that Agron was doing what he thought right and he did not wish to make it any more difficult for him. He wanted this final night to just memorize the feel and smell and sound of Agron before they were to be parted. 

Agron's hand found its way to his chin and tilted Nasir's face up. Agron's eyes were wet as well and he gave a sad smile before bending his head down and kissing Nasir so gently it was as though he feared Nasir would break. 

Every kiss felt like both a promise and an apology. _I'm sorry. I love you. It's something I have to do. I hope you understand. I love you. I can't live without you. I don't want to leave you. I don't want you to leave. I can't bear the thought of you dying. You will never be from my thoughts. Don't forget me. I love you._

Nasir wasn't sure which pleas were his and which were Agron's, but he did not care. He only cared that the man he loved was close and offering comfort. So he just kissed him back until he could not hold back the sobs that wrenched from his chest. Then Agron held him close as Nasir grasped at his skin and shoulders and back, trying to find something to hold onto and keep him grounded through the night to come.

**Author's Note:**

> This has been running around my brain for a while and then I re-watched that episode and I just had to write it. I should probably write those few fics I've told people I will write. But I tend to always watch Spartacus while I'm writing Sparty fic and then I get distracted by some other scene to write or a potential AU. 
> 
> So I have news: Two of my fics were featured in this fic rec list over on tumblr! http://pinkblueyellow92.tumblr.com/post/48457199615/agron-nasir-fanfic-recs-part-1-gif-guide-includes  
> I was so excited to see that because that is the biggest compliment for me, when fans of the show/characters I attempt to write like the way I've written them because I try to write as in character as the story allows. And I'm just so happy! 
> 
> If anyone's still interested in prompting for the next month, feel free! (saras-almanac.tumblr.com)   
> I've only gotten a few prompts, but that's okay. I will write whatever comes my way. I will warn you though, that one prompt it turning out pretty monstrous and as of yet, there's no end in sight. But that's okay because it's an amazing and really interesting prompt, so I'm excited! 
> 
> Gratitude for reading these ramblings!


End file.
